I don’t know what’s going on lately, but the tides are turning for sure.
My friends, relationships, are different. The two people who I’ve been most absorbed with, the most worried about, are all different. My fears are becoming reality.
One has changed due to circumstances beyond my control. In fact, it has nothing to do with me whatsoever. I was just a bystander who was impacted by the explosion. But it doesn’t change the fact that it isn’t the same and probably won’t be.
The other has changed as a result of the first. Or, at least that’s the way it seems on the outside at the moment. Honestly I think it’s been going downhill for a few months. And it hurts.
It hurts because this is who I’ve stood by through everything without judgement. Watched him make mistakes and when he wouldn’t take my advice I didn’t make him feel like an asshole for it. Which is what he’s doing to me now. He doesn’t like decisions I’m making but instead of being a friend about it he keeps on me. I heard you, but I’m still choosing to take the path on the left. Just like I know you heard me when I gave you my advice and opinions, but I didn’t put you down when you chose to ignore me.
I’m sad, too, because this is someone who I had always talked to every day. But the past few months I’d be lucky if we talked once a week. There was a definite turning point. I know exactly when it was, I just don’t know why. Perhaps one day you’ll feel like filling me in on that – if we’re still talking.